Me and My Money…a child’s story of diabetes

M&M Cover 300 small

Copyrighted in 2012, Me & My Money…a child’s story of diabetes, took two years to write…

From birthing thoughts, jotting ideas, typing a manuscript, carrying a daily journal, contacting an illustrator,  building the manuscript, proofreading and editing again and again and again and…you get the idea…this dream came to fruition.  It had do be done.  There is no other book like it — as far as my research goes — that reflects, mimics, or encourages diabetic children, T1Ds.  The book is now available to the general public in paperback form.  Celebrate!!

Submitting to a marketable world with a targeted audience, networking, promoting, speaking, through the main character, Kali with her dog, Money, brings attention to the increase of diabetes in animals – up 300% this past decade!

Through the wonderful insightfulness of illustrator Amy Pichly-Meyer who is responsible for the clarity of expression with the cover design, along with all 37 colored  illustrations, this book was built for you.  I am thankful for her friendship and abilities.

Briefly, the main character, Kali, is presently a fourth grader.  She was diagnosed with diabetes at the age of two.  Her rapid growth with blooming and wizened independence results from learning how to take care of herself.  Wayne, a best friend, knows her very well and together they embark on adventures through Wayne’s hobby, their separate and shared responsibilities, mutual friends, and more.  But Kali cannot forget her special pack!  She must carry this with her everyday, everywhere.

This book, along with the recent publication of Me & My Money Too…a child’s story with diabetes, are tools to understanding this disease.  Minute-by-minute self-care is introduced and forthcoming in this illustrated, easy-to-read chapter book, 104 pages long, appropriate for 8 years olds and available at Amazon.com in paperback edition as well as Kindle e-readers.   Local bookstores carry copies as well as local libraries with requests.  Please enjoy the following Chapter excerpts…

Chapter 1, Book One

Due to keeping up with my chores, I occasionally have some change in my pocket.  That’s because my parents give me a weekly allowance that I can spend when I want.

“Make sure you spend wisely,’ Dad says.  I’m not quite sure what “spend wisely” means, but I think I do okay with what I have.  For instance, one of my friends from school, Wayne, asked me to go to the hobby store one Saturday afternoon.  Because it is school summer vacation time, we could go almost any time, depending on our parents.  However, Saturday’s are best.

Wayne and I go way back, to kindergarten.  He is the only red-head kid in our whole grammar school, never mind our fourth grade.  He’s a full blown carrot top with thick hair in wavy curls.  This makes him real easy to spot in a crowd.  The girls in our class like Wayne more than the boys do.  I think this is because he has good manners and is polite.  It is either that or his clear sky blue eyes that sparkle.  Even his eyelashes are orange, matching his hair.  Most girls I know like blue eyes.  I never thought about it much.  My eyes are dark brown to match my light brown and blonde streaky hair.

Wayne is a pale looking kid.  Most of the time, the only color on Wayne’s face is because of his tannish-brown colored freckles.  I swear, if he didn’t have freckles, he would be white as a ghost!  I tease him about that, pretending that I can’t see him sometimes.  We laugh.  He blushes all red and pink.  It’s funny to see.  Wayne is shorter than I am — for now.  He teases me about my long brown hair — so flat, so straight and thin.  “There’s nothing to your hair,” he tells me as he quickly flicks it in the air.  “You don’t even have to brush it.  Your hair just hangs there off your fat head,” he often tells me as if I need to be reminded. 

I think Wayne is jealous of my straight hair.  Brushing his hair is a struggle because it is very thick.  Mine is a lot easier because it is stick straight.  He hates when his mother brushes his hair because “she always pulls it out of my head,” he told me one time.  “And you have a chubby little pug-nose.  Not like my pointy one at all,” he compares.  “But you get a tan in the summer.  I don’t tan, I burn.  It’s awful,” he explains.  That is true.

One summer that I remember, his mother covered his face and arms with white suntan lotion so  he wouldn’t get burned while playing with me in my back yard.  He looked so funny.  That stuff made him smell like the beach.  I laughed at him.  He didn’t like that.  And after a while, the suntan lotion disappeared.  But we stayed friends.  He wears that stuff all the time.  Sure, I use it too, but when I forget to rub it on my skin, I don’t get too worried.

“I guess you look like your father,” I told him because I think he does.  “I look like my mother,” I said.  And that’s okay with me because my mother is beautiful.  My Dad’s okay looking — for a Dad.  Sometimes he has a moustache.  Mom told him to shave it off because it made her sneeze when they kiss.  Eeeuu!  Sneezing and kissing, yuck!

“Kali,” my mom called up the stairs.  “Wayne is on the phone for you.”

“Okay.  Thanks.  I’ll get it up here,” I told her.

“Hi Wayne.  Wassup?”

“Hey.  Can you come to the train store with me today or what?  I’m looking for a certain model train engine and I think the Viking Hobby Store will have it.”

Well, I have no particular interest in model trains, so I knew I wouldn’t buy anything but I would go along with him anyway.  This is a wise decision.  After all, he is my very best friend.  Very best friends do things for each other whether we need to or like to or not.  It was Saturday morning anyway.  Cleaning my room could wait until I got back.  I was thinking, planning.

“Mom, Dad, is it okay with you if I go to the hoppy store with Wayne today?  He thinks he found the perfect train engine for his set.  He wants me to go and help him check it out.”

“I don’t mind.  Is your room picked up?” Mom asked.

“Not all the way yet, Mom,” I replied.  “I can finish when I get back.  All I have to do is fold my clothes and put them away.  A load of my socks and some t-shirts are still in the dryer.”

“Well, all right.  Did you ask your father?” Mom wanted to know.  “And don’t forget to take a snack and some juice boxes with you.”

“I know.  I already have a pack of peanut butter nabs in my sack with some water.  I don’t know where Dad is.  I thought he was in the kitchen with you.  Maybe he’s in the garage.”

“Okay,” continued my mother.  “If you don’t see your father on your way out, I’ll tell him.  If you do, please remind him that we’re going shopping today.  Oh, are you and Wayne taking your bikes or walking?”

“I think we’ll walk.”  And out the back door I went.

Chapter 2

Wayne lives four houses away from me.  I took the short-cut over to his house through a wildflower field.  I often come here to pick my mother some flowers.  I like to pick flowers for her.  There are all kinds of wildflowers in this field: yellow ones, pink ones, purple ones with yellow centers.  I don’t know the names of these flowers, I just know they are pretty and Mom likes them.

After I met Wayne on the front porch of his house, we proceeded to walk to this particular ‘train store’ as he calls it.  It is really a hobby store that has lots of other things of interest besides trains.  I’ve been in there with one of my older cousins.  She was looking for some particular, special types of paint brushes made with camel’s hair.  I thought that was cool — paint brushes made out of a camel’s hair!  There are small glider planes in this store with hand-held motor devices; there are different kinds of wood burners and wood carving tools; there are even lots of different colored rubber fish bait things — lures.  I liked those because they are shiny, squishy, and they squiggle.  Things that would attract a fish — go figure!  Wayne had been going on about a certain model train engine he saw in here a while ago.  It took him weeks and weeks to save up his allowance money to buy it.

“Hey, before we walk too far, is your insulin pump filled up?” Wayne asked.  “I hope it doesn’t beep like crazy while we are out.  I would hate to have to leave early so you could fix it.”

“Yes, it’s fine.  I filled it up with insulin yesterday morning and changed the needle site.  We are good to go!”  I planned this on purpose.  I knew he would ask.  I am diabetic.  Wayne knows.  Among many other things, I do take care of myself and my diabetes.  I have to test my blood sugar levels many times each day.  Diabetes is a disease that causes me not to digest food properly.  Because of that, I wear an insulin pump.  I used to have to take insulin shots before I got the pump.  Having the pump is much easier.  An insulin pump squirts insulin into my body, automatically, a tiny bit at a time.  A “squirt” is maybe the size of a pencil tip or the size of a period at the end of a sentence.  My parents had to give me insulin shots before I learned to give them myself.  I still keep syringes handy, in case the pump breaks down for whatever reason.  This is called having “Plan B” which is important. 

Read more of Kali’s young life with diabetes in “Me & My Money…a child’s story of diabetes.”  Available at Amazon.com.

Diabetes Emergency Preparedness Plan from the Diabetes Disaster Response Coalition

“DO YOU OR A LOVED ONE HAVE DIABETES AND USE INSULIN?

“Make a plan to stay healthy during natural disaster or emergency.  Managing diabetes can be even harder when you are dealing with a major storm, loss of electricity, and possible evacuation from your home. Building a “diabetes kit” now can save a lot of worry and time when a disaster strikes.

“A checklist template is included for your use. Your diabetes kit can be stored in an easy-to-carry waterproof bag or container to hold the documents, information, and supplies that you will want to have with you.

“Important Information to Keep In Your Kit – Write down or copy the following:

Type of diabetes you have

Other medical conditions, allergies, and previous surgeries

Current medications, doses, and time you take them. Include your pharmacy name, address and phone number.

Previous diabetes medications you have taken

A letter from your diabetes care team with a list of your most recent diabetes medications, if possible.

A copy of your most recent laboratory result, like A1C results

Make, model and serial number of your insulin pump or CGM. Include pump manufacturer’s phone number in case you need to replace your device.

Doctor’s name, phone number, and address

Phone numbers and email addresses for your family, friends, and work.  Include out-of-town contacts.

A copy of your health insurance card  A copy of your photo ID  Cash

Source: Adapted from American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists (AACE) – My Diabetes Emergency Plan. 

For additional emergency preparation resources for people with diabetes, visit: http://mydiabetesemergencyplan.com/  and www.DiabetesDisasterResponse.org • Questions? Call 765-314-DDRC (765-314-3372).

Additional week supply (or more) of all medications, including insulin and Glucagon, if prescribed.  If you lose power and you have unused insulin, don’t throw it out!  In an emergency, it is okay to use expired or non-refrigerated insulin.

Protect your insulin pump from water.

Supplies to check your blood sugar, like testing strips and lancets. Don’t forget extra batteries!

Extra supplies for insulin pump or CGM  Cooler and reusable cold packs  Note: Do NOT use dry ice and do not freeze the medication

Empty plastic bottle or sharps container to safely carry syringes, needles and lancets

Items to treat high blood sugar such as pump supplies (infusion sets) and/or syringes

Items to treat low blood sugar (hypoglycemia), like:

Juice  Hard candy (not sugar-free)  Regular soda  Glucose tablets

Honey Glucagon 

Other Supplies to Pack

2-day supply of non-perishable ready-to-go food, like:

Pre-packaged tuna, beans, cheese and cracker snacks etc.

Nuts or nut butters  High-fiber/protein granola bars  Dried fruits

Anything according to dietary restrictions

A 3-day supply of bottled water (or more)  •  Toilet paper, tissues, paper towels, trash bags

Pen/pencil and notepad to record blood sugar, other test results and any new signs/symptoms

First aid supplies like bandages, cotton swabs, and antibiotic ointments or creams

Extra clothing, including socks and undergarments

Cell phone and charging supplies for phone and pump including battery pack

Flashlight and batteries

Other Recommendations

Make sure that all your vaccinations are up-to-date.

Choose a meeting place with your family in case you are separated.

Write down location and include in your kit.

Wear a medical ID or medical alert bracelet or other form of identification in case you are

evacuated to a relief shelter.

For children, write down name of school, address and phone number.

“NEED HELP?   1-800-DIABETES (800-342-2383) Contact The American Diabetes Association Center For Information, MON.-FRI. 9:00 A.M. TO 7:00 P.M. ET. Representative are regularly updated with information on how to access medical support, shelters, pharmacies and more.

EMERGENCY DIABETES SUPPLY HOTLINE: 1-314-INSULIN (314-467-8546). The DDRC hotline has been activated for physicians and health care providers to notify us of diabetes supply shortages and request support.”

Pray, Pray, Pray

“Why Catholics Say the Rosary”

“The Rosary as we know it was developed in the Middle Ages.  It evolved out of an ancient practice in which people who could not read Scripture recited 150 Our Fathers for the 150 Psalms.  Strings of beads, called ‘pater-nosters’ were used to keep track of the prayers.

“Over time, this practice merged with the Scriptures greeting to Mary (‘Hail Mary, full of grace…’) and with meditations on the lives of Christ and Mary.

“In groups or in a family, one person can say the first half of each prayer, while others respond with the second half.

“The Rosary is, at its heart, a biblical prayer, which is why Scripture verses are often used for meditation with each mystery.”

“How to Pray the Rosary”

  1. “Begin with the Sign of the Cross.  Pray the Apostles’ Creed while holding the crucifix (part of a set of Rosary beads.)
  2. Pray an Our Father.
  3. Pray three Hail Marys.
  4. Pray the Glory Be, announce the first mystery, than pray an Our Father.
  5. Pray ten Hail Marys (called a decade).
  6. Pray the Glory Be and the Fatima Prayer.
  7. Before each decade, announce the next mystery, followed by an Our Father.  For each set of ten Hail Marys (or beads on the Rosary string), pray ten Hail Marys while meditating on the mystery.
  8. After the five decades are completed, pray the Hail, Holy Queen and the concluding Rosary Prayer.”

In these 21st century days of strife and hardship, of neglect and forgotten promises, prayers are consoling to the human mind and soul.

When you need to know more, please let me know by leaving a comment.

Thank you…A. K. Buckroth

You’re Invited….

Come Walk With Me!  October 20th and/or October 7th.

Do you like to walk?  Would you like to walk with me and others, many of whom you know?  Many with whom you’ll become fascinated?  Acquainted?  Well, everybody’s got a story, right?

The following are Upcoming, 2018, Community Events, Family Friendly with a Wonderful Cause!

Walk4Literacy.org (google this link for all the informational details) has all the details you need to get involved.  As I say, “Four miles ain’t nothin’.”  Join me.  Be a part, a peice.

AND…

Know a diabetic? Love a diabetic? care for a Diabetic?

Walk.JDRF.org    October 7, 2018     AND/OR        JDRF.org/NORCAL  October 20, 2018

Through “Andrea’s Angels,” the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation is making fundraising climes toward a cure for diabetes.  Thorough details can be found in the links above.  “What’s a cuppla more miles?”  lol.

Cordially,

Andrea K. Roth (aka: A. K. Buckroth)

Traveling with Diabetes: Tips from JDRF (Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation)

JDRF
#Buckroth

BEAT THE HEAT

Summer Travel Checklist

Planning a trip before summer ends?
Double check our packing list to make sure you have everything you need to manage your type 1 diabetes (T1D) wherever you go!

A travel letter from your doctor with written approval to travel with insulin and syringes
Insulin
Syringes
Insulin pens
Test strips
Lancets
Ketone test strips
Back-up snacks for quick carbs
Emergency glucagon
Equipment including blood glucose meters, CGMs and insulin pumps

You’ll find this packing list and more helpful ways to make the most of your summer—while keeping T1D in check—in JDRF’s Summer Guide.

GET THE GUIDE

GETTING IT OFF MY CHEST by Steve Liddick

This blog regards the down side of complaining by award-winning author and publisher, Steve Liddick.  I you are unfamiliar with Steve’s works, they can be found here: www.steveliddick.com.

I specifically posted this in mind of all the T1Ds around the world.  You have been heard.  This “reflection” is proof.  Now, where was I?  Oh….

GETTING IT OFF MY CHEST

REFLECTIONS

by Steve Liddick

“You know how people say, “I don’t like to complain, but . . .?” Well, I don’t like to complain, Not just because it doesn’t do a bit of good to moan about this and that. No, I try to avoid complaining around other people because they don’t want to hear it. They have their own problems and don’t need to take on mine.

“You want to kill a conversation, just start complaining about something—anything—and watch as people drift away from you. The more often a discouraging word is heard, the more cloudy the skies are all day.

“Complaining takes many forms. Say you’re at a four-way stop intersection and some clodhopper pulls out in front you when it’s not his turn. You lay on your horn, make all kinds of specialty hand gestures, and scream nasty bits about the offender’s maternal parentage.

“Who do the other two drivers at the intersection get upset with? Not the aforementioned clodhopper who cut you off. They stare white-hot daggers at the guy making the fuss. Nobody likes a complainer?

“When people greet you with “Hi, how you doin’?” you are expected to say, “Great, how’re you?” Start unloading woes on them and watch as their eyes glaze over and they remember meetings they’re late for.

“I am here to tell you that, while nobody wants to hear your beefs, it is injurious to one’s health to keep it all bottled up. Something has got to give. An outlet must be found for the steam that is building, threatening to explode your head.

“Mental health professionals are of no use at all. In fact, when they say, “and how do you feel about that?” you know they’re not really listening and that just ticks me off that much more.

I can’t even get it out of my system by yelling at my wife. She knows where the frying pans are and I have to sleep sometime.”

Diabetes Research “Is Complicated”

JDRF

T1D Science Explained: Beta Cells

We’re excited to share with you the exciting research and progress being made on beta cell replacement therapies and what that means in our pursuit of a cure for type 1 diabetes (T1D).

In our pancreas, we find beta cells: a type of cell located in the pancreatic islets that produce insulin. Unfortunately, in people with T1D, these cells are attacked and often destroyed by the body’s own immune system.

Scientists do not know why exactly this misguided attack happens, but recent studies are uncovering promising findings: that beta cells may become stressed before the onset of T1D and potentially trigger it and that we are born with a finite number of beta cells that die off in those with T1D. Some researchers are working on finding the cause of the immune attacks while others are focused on how to protect and replace beta cells. Restoring beta cell function could mean insulin independence—in essence, a cure. Below is a summary of how far your support has allowed us to progress in beta cell replacement therapies.

Islet Transplantation

Previous islet cell transplantations have showed a lot of benefits for those with T1D. Clinical trial patients have seen improvements in glycemic control and some islet recipients remained independent from insulin for up to five years. While these transplants are not possible for widespread use—there are a limited number of available transplants and a need for strong immunosuppressive drugs to protect the donor cells from the continued immune attacks—this research was a big step forward in T1D research and brought us closer to the next step: encapsulation.

Encapsulation

Encapsulation aims to take the benefits of islet transplantation while eliminating the need for immunosuppressive drugs. By adding a protective barrier to beta cells before they are implanted, we can shield them from immune system attacks while still allowing insulin and glucose to flow through the cells and the pancreas. Researchers are getting close. A recent partnership between Eli Lilly and Sigilon Therapeutics—based on JDRF-funded work—is testing a cell encapsulation strategy that would make beta cells essentially unrecognizable to the immune system and free to function as they are meant to, while Novo Nordisk has recently announced its commitment to bring beta cell replacement closer to clinical trials.

Gene Modification

Other studies are exploring how to protect cells from the immune system attack from another angle. JDRF-funded research is seeking the answer to a vital question: How can the beta cell protect itself from the immune attack, without the need for a capsule or coating to shield it? Based on exciting progress made in genome editing technologies, T1D researchers are looking to edit the DNA sequences in the beta cell responsible for attracting immune cells. This technology could eliminate, or lessen, the need for encapsulation altogether by altering beta cells to alleviate the stress that triggers the attack and to protect themselves from autoimmune attacks.

T1D-Science_nPOD_linebreak.jpg

Beta cell replacement therapies have incredible potential to reduce and even eliminate the dependence of those with T1D on insulin. The research is complex, but we want to make sure you’re kept in the loop as the research unfolds because we know it will have tremendous impact for everyone connected to T1D.

 

Find out more.
Support T1D research
linkbreak.jpg

Viruses May Cause T1D and Other Autoimmune Diseases

Posted in Diabetes Research News

“Viruses are the cause of many health conditions and affect the body in different ways. As scientists learn more about these viruses, they can develop targeted strategies for preventing and treating them. A major breakthrough was recently discovered involving a very common virus known as the Epstein-Barr Virus or EBV.

“EBV is most commonly known for causing mononucleosis (mono) or the “kissing disease” since it is often transmitted via saliva. By age 20, more than 90 percent of the population in developed countries will be infected by the disease. This rate spikes in under-developed countries with more than 90 percent of the population being affected by age 2. There is no cure for the virus – it remains in the body for life, though may not have a noticeable impact.

“However, researchers have found that the effect it can have at a cellular level may be more significant than previously realized. Scientists from the Cincinnati Children’s Hospital’s Center for Autoimmune Genomics and Etiology have published a study potentially linking EBV to seven diseases, including T1D. One of the Diabetes Research Connection’s own Scientific Review Committee members, Matthias Von Herrath, was an author on an article cited by the study in its research.

“Typically, the body responds to viruses by increasing the production of antibodies by B cells. These antibodies then attack and destroy the virus. However, with EBV, the virus actually takes over the B cells and re-programs them using transcription factors. This alters the way that B cells respond and can change their basic function, which may increase the risk of developing other diseases. The scientists have narrowed it down to one factor in particular – the EBNA2 protein.

“Transcription factors associated with this protein attach to and change sections of person’s genetic code. Depending on where they attach, it could contribute to different diseases including T1D, lupus, multiple sclerosis, rheumatoid arthritis, celiac disease, and more. Identifying what is happening on a cellular level could help researchers to develop more targeted treatment options and potential cures for these diseases. The study also opens doors for more in-depth research regarding how transcription factors may affect other gene variants and diseases.

“These findings are very encouraging in better understanding some of the underlying factors that may contribute to T1D. More research is necessary to explore each disease in particular and the potential impact from EBV and the EBNA2 protein. The Diabetes Research Connection is excited to see where these discoveries may lead moving forward and how it could change the future of T1D treatment. The DRC provides funding to early-career scientists pursuing novel research studies on type 1 diabetes to improve prevention strategies, treatment options, and management techniques as well as potentially find a cure. Learn more about current projects and provide support by visiting http://diabetesresearchconnection.org.”

Happily copied and pasted for you by A. K. Buckroth, #buckroth.

By-Products of Diabetes by E. Ashley Skinner

…Copy & Pasted from Facebook on May 11, 2018….

“I can’t say this will be my last post for a while, but maybe the last of many…. love U all! Certainly, in the most difficult moments of life U realize who R true friends, or ppl who really do appreciate U. Unfortunately, some friends will click “like”, but they don’t really take time to read your status if they see it’s long. I have decided to publish this message to make ppl aware of the horrific byproducts of type 1 diabetes. This disease ruins your neural, cardiovascular❤️, & renal systems & can cause blindness….& the drug, Insulin, that is prescribed, doesn’t fix the true problem of the disease & could also be the very thing that kills U. (The true problem of type 1 diabetes is the Immune system attacking things it shouldn’t.)  Now I’m looking 👀for those ppl who’ll have the time🕛to read this post ’til the end. Type 1 Diabetes is very invasive & destructive to our bodies, even after treatment w/Insulin, & medications sometimes for resistance to insulin, or if you’re a type 2. Your body’s still struggling w/itself trying to regulate foreign invaders & knowing what to keep, & what to kill, & the spiking & dropping of your blood sugars doesn’t ever stop.🛑. Plz, in honor of a family member, or friend who has died💀, or who continue to fight diabetes, of any type, copy & paste (not share) on your page. So I’m gonna find out who reads📖my posts. Please write “done” in the comments.”

Copyright 2018.

Just lettin’ you know…again.  Author A. K. Buckroth

“Shameless Hussy Looks Back” by June Comarsh Gillam

My friend, June Gillam, caretaker and long-time spouse of a diabetic mentioned herein, wrote this poem with great love for him.  Her shared and devotional intentions are purposely written for all to learn.

http://www.junegillam.com/

1.
After he wheeled his chair in, all independent like
from his morning shower just the other day
and transferred smoothly onto the king-sized bed,
I finished toweling him off and rubbed it dry,
fluffing up the curly golden short hairs it nested in,
resplendent in its pinky glow.

“No gray hairs down here!” I marveled,
bending over my mate of 29 years
to rub my face lightly back and forth
on his sweet soft sausage,
rolling it around
beneath my lips.

2.
Back when we were new –
He in his black leather boots, and
I in my shameless hussy moans –
He would have sprung up tall and hard so fast
I couldn’t have finished the toweling off
before he put to use that splendid package,
with his bull balls slung low,
and banging gently on my bum.

I would cling to his skin
and ride him up the steep sides
of the mountain, onto the high plateau,
leaving my mind behind
in the merciful death of thoughts,
simply flying his horse of many colors
across the vast and lasting mesa.

3.
After each of his blood sugar dramas
like a five-way coronary bypass,
two carotid artery surgeries,
claudication of the legs
and losing a toe here and there
he resumed his relentless and leather-booted interest.
Although requiring some modifications, some assistance
from those little blue pills and from those brown
packages that arrived in the mail with various humming
and buzzing adult toys he wanted to try out.
“I’ll never quit,” he vowed and indeed
each time he rose again, triumphant.

My libido shriveled
as spontaneous flights across the highland mesa
faded into movies in my memory,
and it turned into an unexpected duty to search
to find my shameless hussy’s eager heart.

4.
“I am still interested,” he says today,
but that soft pink sausage resting like a newborn’s
tells a different story.

“Did you think I would give up?”

“I had lately come to hope exactly that
this year since his near death, two-month stay
in ICU with kidney failure and dialysis,
open wound dressings, and half year of physical therapy
since the amputation of his left leg, above the knee.

“I sent away for a book on sex for the disabled,”
he says, “but it hasn’t arrived yet.”

One day soon, the mail will come –
I’m digging deep into the great divide of time
to find my shameless hussy long-departed self”

Come back, come back, come back!

I cry out to her.

–  I can’t do this all alone!

Peregrine